Procrastination is Like Alcohol

{By Kyle Griesinger}

Hi, my name is Kyle and I am a procrastiholic. Its been 21 days since my last deadline passed. I am sure that the IO staff appreciates the irony that said deadline was for this post. I am also sure you’re thinking; “Why would I want to read about why procrastination is bad?” Well I see your point, however I am an officially licensed expert on the subject! Well, almost officially licensed, they were supposed to send me my certificate more than a month ago… now that I think about it I will have to remember to bug Bob about that at our next Procrastinators Anonymous meeting… But that’s beside the point. Let’s just say that I am an expert!

Now, on to the point of this article, procrastination is like alcohol, and here is how:

1. It’s Addictive!


Procrastination begets procrastination. If you miss one deadline then you eat into the time you should have been spending trying to make your next deadline… My next deadline is in 10 days. Bad!

2. It Feels Good While You are Partaking


Though I have no actual experience with the alcohol side of this one, I am making an assumption that people wouldn’t do things that could kill you if they weren’t enjoyable… wait, black Friday… though not as strongly, I still stand by my assumption!

3. It never Feels Good Afterward


You know that feeling the day after you miss a deadline, you know, disappointment with yourself, shame because you said you wouldn’t do this again, etc. Well I figure that’s how a hangover must feel. Plus nausea and a massive headache!

How not to procrastinate

1. Set S.M.A.R.T. Goals


This is an acronym I learned in National Youth Leadership Training for the BSA. Smart Goals are:

S = Specific
M = Measurable
A = Attainable
R = Realistic
T= Timely

You want specific goals, like: I will workout every other day. Not general goals like: I will lose weight.

Measurable goals can be measured at different mile stones, for example: I have worked out every other day for 1 month.

Attainable goals means not setting your goals at something that you can never do, for example to weigh 150 lbs. is not an attainable goal for me. It would be unhealthy for me to weigh that little.

Realistic and timely go together. A goal without a deadline is just dream. But your deadline should be realistic: an unrealistic goal to lose 50 lbs. in a month. A realistic goal would be to lose 50 lbs. in a year.

2. Set times to work on deadlines


I love to watch movies and TV shows in my glorious home theatre, I own all 7 seasons of psych on DVD, and a lot of times I will opt to do that rather than say, work on my IO article … But I find that if I set smart goals for the day and force myself to accomplish those before I watch anything it helps me a lot!

3. Join a Procrastinators Anonymous Group


Though it can be really hard to get them to meet (everybody always want to put it off until its more convenient) they can help.

Ok there is no such thing as Procrastinators Anonymous, but seriously having someone hold you accountable to your deadline can be a big help. And they shouldn’t just check with you on your deadline, they should hold you accountable for you intermediate smart goals too.

So now you know everything you need to know about procrastination.

Go forth with this knowledge and be glorious!